Friday, October 3, 2008
Out of Sight, Never Out of Mind
About seven years ago I did something stupid, which caused my friendship with my friend Michelle (who was attached to my hip for the longest time) to be irretrievably broken. To be perfectly honest, I mourned our broken relationship more than I mourned for my ex-husband. I still miss her to this day. She was someone I could do anything and everything crazy with - but also the person who would bring me a prescription if I got sick. As we've previously discussed, I don't deal well (with anything, but that's a different story) with people leaving, especially when I have no say in it, and I don't think I've ever gotten over it. I miss her all the time. I guess I was thinking about it since it was around this time of year that our big fight happened. Also, I miss my BFF so freaking much. I don't know why he stopped talking to me and I guess I don't care. I don't understand how someone could just stop talking to someone they normally speak to 100 times a day. It doesn't make sense to me. It's been since June that we've had no contact and in my mind I probably try to call him every other minute of the day (I don't actually call him, I just want to...OK, I've called a few times. I'll admit it). I feel incomplete. He was the only person who could calm me down and make me make sense. Without our debriefing at the end of each day, I don't know what to do with myself. Sure, I've got great friends who I love and adore, but there's nothing like a BFF. Wow, who knew I was going to be so freaking maudlin today?