Thursday, July 30, 2009

Pinky's Brown List

As I mentioned a few days ago, while attending the play last weekend, I encountered a celebrity who declined a picture (the nerve!). Yep, that's right - when I walked into the patio area to wait for Chris Noth/Pine to come out, there sat Jason Patric. Um, hi. So, of course I approached him for a picture. His response? "I'd prefer not to, as this is their gig and I wouldn't want to detract attention." Um, really? Really? I mean, fine, say no, but there's no need to make up some bullcrap story. You're better than that. Because of this atrocity, I've decided to compile my Brown List (OK, in reality, this could be considered my sh*t list, but I'm trying to make it color-centric and family-friendly). Aside from Jason, who obviously makes the list automatically for his response alone, I present the rest of the Brown List:
So, I was about to put that this list was in no particular order, but that would be a lie because, of course, my girl Kelly Clarkson is going to top the list (and yes, I did post a hideous picture of her on purpose - what a bitter, bitter girl I am). We've all suffered the story of her rebuffment long enough, but it should be noted that each and every one of the celebrities on my Brown List may redeem themselves just by taking a picture with me. See, I'm a forgiving person. I'll let them make it up to me. Kelly, try not to go "spontaneously deaf" the next time I see you, OK? OK.
The next douchebag to make the Brown List is Samuel L. Jackson, who is so far the only celebrity to not only say no, but make me cry. BASTARD (ooops, so much for family friendly).Anthony Kiedis is on the Brown List, but I really don't care if I get a picture with him or not. Still, the elaborate way he shot me down ("I thank you, but no" with the hand gestures...we all remember) makes me want to get one anyway.
Now, technically, both Katherine Heigl and Denise Richards didn't shoot me down. In fact, both said they'd BE RIGHT BACK and take a picture with me, but then they both blew me off. Don't they know I waited patiently with baited breath for long periods of time (read: 20 minutes tops) for them to return?!? Why must they waste my time? Why make promises they can't keep? What did I do to them?Ah, Ryan Reynolds. I always thought he'd be so nice. I even watched him on Three Men and a Pizza Place. But, alas, I was wrong. He shot me down because he was "busy." Whatever. Busy shmusy. Don't walk down Main Street then, big shot. You're going to get stopped. That's all there is to it. However, just take a picture with me and all is forgiven.

1 comment:

Tracie said...

What - no Ashton Kutcher?