Dear Keith Urban: Please button up your top button. None of us need to see your weird tattoo sticking out. Plus, it looks sloppy.
Dear Nicole Kidman: Didn't anyone ever tell you to stand up straight? Are you suffering from some new type of hunchback? 
Dear Mary J. Blige: It was certainly nice of you to leave the wedding where you were apparently Mother of the Bride. Glad your dress could be interchangeable like that.
Dear Kate Hudson: You know, most of the time I think you're a pretty girl. So, why are you trying to look yuch? Also, your ears are your worst feature. Try not to accentuate those.
Dear Jennifer Lopez: Thank you for yet another opportunity for me to say CHA CHA CHA.
Dear Demi Lovato: It really isn't necessary to match your dress to your translucent skin. I'm just saying.
Dear Kate Hudson: You know, most of the time I think you're a pretty girl. So, why are you trying to look yuch? Also, your ears are your worst feature. Try not to accentuate those.Dear Jennifer Lopez: Thank you for yet another opportunity for me to say CHA CHA CHA.Dear Demi Lovato: It really isn't necessary to match your dress to your translucent skin. I'm just saying.
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