Dear Taylor Swift: I understand that you're traveling and tired, but why did you have to steal the wardrobe from the Flashdance set?
Dear Kendra: While I applaud your Pink Day spirit, I'm not sure wearing a dress that is gaudier than the cake is the smartest idea. I'm just saying.
Dear Mrs. Douchebag: Why are you wearing a dress full of paper airplanes and/or origami swans? 
Dear Katie Holmes: I'm sure they'll believe TC's driver's license. There's no reason to have to smuggle him into the bar under your coat.
Dear Lady Gaga: Ah, the classic question - Which came first? The Gaga or the Wax Figurine? You're kinda looking like both right now.
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