Dear Jessica Simpson: Please get a stylist soon. I can't bear to watch this travesty go on much longer. Dear Matthew Mc-con-a-hottie: If you must wear clothes, please wear suits and ties all the time. Yum.Dear Ryan Seacrest: Your beard is showing.
Dear Zac Efron: Hold on a minute. I can't speak. Drooling too much.....Oh, crap. What was I saying?